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Joke of the Day

"What do you call Nicky Minaj's ass? Silicone valley"

"Go see American Sniper. Or go to your buddy's house and watch him play Call of Duty for two hours"

"I used to hate my tumor But it grew on me."

"Wife: It's like every man on earth has to share one brain Me: [can't think of a good comeback because it's not my turn to use the brain]"

"What's the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? One's a slimy, scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other is delicious dipped in batter and deep-fried. *-Hannibal Lecter*"

"I like my women how I like my fish. Battered. I thought of it all by myself! :D"

"I used to be addicted to the hokey-pokey... until I turned myself around!"

"Electrical engeneer An electrical engeneer had a strong shocking force, so strong that he thought he should lower it. He started to meditate jokingly and he said ""ohms""."

"Why aren't Jews easily distracted? because they've been to concentration camp."

"I made a car entirely out of pencils, rubbers, rulers and notebooks. Went to turn the key.. Stayed stationary."