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Joke of the Day

"When do you kick a midget in the balls? When he's standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice"

"I asked Princess Leia why her and Han weren't going to make it... She said it is because ""Han shot first."""

"""Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."" The priest replied, ""I know. I saw your tweet!"""

"I just came back from a Muslim birthday party. The musical chairs was a bit slow but, fuck me!! passing the parcel was super quick."

"How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb? Find out next time, on Dragonball Z!!!"

"How do you fit 4 gay men on a barstool? Flip it over."

"People who don't understand sarcasm are awesome."

"A stranger phoned me up last night asking me to meet him in the woods because he wanted to see my balls... Weirdo never showed up."

"I asked the guy from 127 Hours for help with my homework. He said, ""I would give you a hand, but I'm stumped."" I'll show myself out."

"[ Boyfriend walks into the room ] Well, well, well....if it isn't the boy who tried to break up with me in a dream last night."