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Joke of the Day
"Q: What do you call a fly with no wings? A: A walk."
Next Joke
"Old people, when you say ""the good ol' days,"" do you mean during the draft, or when black people had separate bathrooms?"
"I can't decide if I want to watch the original Star Trek of The Next Generation... I guess you could say I'm stuck between a Spock and a Picard place!"
"""WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS GOING ON? IS THAT RAIN? OH GOD I WISH I HAD EYES"" - Worms"
"Why do chefs put so much effort into baking cakes? Because you only get out what you pudding."
"I'm not very good at baking... my friend said to stick with it dough, it'll pan out in the end."
"So Boxing Day, its a magical time of year, when companies send you amazing emails with pictures of all the stuff you just brought from them, at half price."
"Walking down the street I was walking home form work and I saw a bee crawling on the grass. I was thinking of stepping on it, then I decided 'ehh I'll let it be'"
"You can't boss me around until you're older than the whiskey I drink. -subtweet to my GF"
"Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? "