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Joke of the Day

"What did the Spanish boy leaving for the city say to his father? Ciudad!"

"I want to open a resturant called ""I don't care"" So I could finally go to that place my girlfriend is always talking about."

"5-year-old: Why don't we say Grace? Me: I don't know. 5-year-old: Me: 5-year-old: Is it because your cooking makes God angry?"

"[coming home from cinema] Don't let that ninja film go to your head again. *roundhouse kicks the light switch on* ""I won't"""

"""Mommy, I don't wanna grow up and die!"" ""Oh. Well, you can die at any age, really."""

"What do they call spiders in the Middle East? Iraqnids"

"Women are not complicated at all, except when they expect us to read between the lines."

"Nice try Jehovah's Witnesses but dressing up like cops and telling me you have a warrant is not going to get me to come to my door."

"Yo mama so ugly the bassilisk couldn't look her in the eye."

"There are two types of people in the world Employed people and english majors"