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Joke of the Day

"What would you rather be stamped on by a herd of elephants or an angry woman in high heels... At least the elephants you could reason with"

"Diarrhea is hereditary... It runs in the jeans (genes)"

"The last time you got a piece of ass... Was when your fingers slipped through the toilet paper."

"Where did the pilgrims land when they came to America ? On their feet !"

"Want to hear the shortest joke in the world? Midget shortage."

"Interviewer: Your resume only has ""Mad"" under ""Skills"" Me: Yeah boyee Interviewer: *tears up* You're just what we need. Welcome to Subway."

"Perhaps one day he'll meet his Girl Fieri."

"Subway: When you pay to eat fresh Just like Jared"

"How did people charge their phones before electricity? They didn't...!"

"Call your boring friend Simon, ""Sighmon"" he'll never know the difference and you can laugh about it with your cool bros over beers."