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Joke of the Day
"Naps are for old people. I was taking a horizontal life pause."
Next Joke
 
"So my dad was at the hardware store and asked if I needed anything. I said I was hungry and he said... ""Sure I'll get you some nuts ;)"""
"Wow, the last couple of elections have been great! We had a white president, then a black president, and now an orange one."
"What has a ring but no fingers? The former owner of a Note 7"
"It's the same old story; boy meets girl in park... ... boy parks meat in girl"
"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow? Give her a shovel!"
"For every upvote this gets, my girlfriend and I will try one thrust of anal sex. Please don't upvote. Her strap-on is huge."
"What did one car muffler say to the other car muffler? ""Am I exhausted!"""
"Don't ever do that again knock know who's there? 9/11 9/11 who? .... You said you'd never forget"
"I thought it was a booger... But itsnot."