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Joke of the Day

"Cereal, you need milk more than milk needs you. Just being real."

"If you're reading this.. then you are not Floyd Mayweather."

"Grandmother: ""So what is Skype?"" *Explains in great detail on how it works* ""So do I need a computer for it?"" ""I JUST...how's your cat?"""

"If the ESPN Fantasy Football app were slower and unreliable it would be playing quarterback for the Bears."

"A good will gesture . . . A friendly chap from a local charity asked for a donation towards restoring the community swimming pool today. . . I gave him a bottle of water."

"Have you heard about Unilevers ice cream It was their magnum opis. (Yes, I know next to no one will get this joke at all)"

"If you want to pick up girls ....Keep your back straight and lift with your knees"

"Like father, like son Son: Dad, why do people suffer so much in life? Dad: ... for the final five push-ups."

"What did the Shit Summoner say at the bar ? Mind if I pull up a stool ?"

"Why can't you play UNO with Mexicans? They'll steal all of the green cards."