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Joke of the Day

"How do you fit an elephant into a safeway bag? You take the 's' out of safe and the 'f' out of way."

"A guy walks into a bar of soap."

"eer booze and fun!' 'A guy walks into a bar carrying a pair of jumper cables. He sets 'em down on the bar. And then the bartender said ""Now dont you start anything!!"""

"Why are women such bad drivers? Because they are constantly lied to about what 8"" is."

"Just imagine how good prescription cheese would be."

"A guy wire is holding a pole... ...the pole is 10 meters tall, the wire makes a 48^o angle from the ground and the very tip is 7 meters from the pole. How long until the feminists arrive?"

"Little on the nose that the Pope's riding around in a Fiat, isn't it? But then, I guess we know he's into that Fiat luxe."

"I used to work in a haunted pub... There was spirits everywhere."

"What to you call Batman and Robin after they've been run over by a car? Flatman and Ribbon"

"""Your keys are over THERE."" - Wow. You have eagle eyes! ""Yup. My vision is 20/20."" - No. I mean they're small, beady & kinda close together."