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Joke of the Day
"Why does Dr Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife died."
Next Joke
"I justified buying a PS3 because I knew I could always use it to just watch movies, and now that's the only reason I still have it. A 250GB hard drive holds a shitload of internet porn"
"This Christmas... This Christmas, Donald Trump's hair becomes sentient and nukes canada. Only one Democratic Socialist can prevent a total World War. Bernie Sanders stars... in HELL TOUPEE"
"How many Redditors does it take to tell a joke? Two. One to post it and another to create a better punchline in the comments."
"A guy walks into a bar holding a pair of jumper cables He says, ""Hey bartender, can I get a drink over here?"" The bartender says, ""Alright, but don't go trying to start anything in here"""
"""That's you"" is one of my favorite games to play with my husband when we see disgusting people."
"According to movies when a huge object is chasing you, left and right turns do not exist."
"I'm not worried at all about this Ebola crisis. I've just purchased the new 2015 edition of Norton Antivirus. Feeling pretty smug."
"I'm wearing a shower curtain over my head and pretending to be a ghost. I probably look legit because everybody on this bus is avoiding me."
"I still struggle daily with how Ed Hardy happened"