46646

Joke of the Day

"Hey other men: I'm tweeting this from your mom's phone. The implication being that she's sexually promiscuous: a big insult in our culture."

"What's the difference between Jews and Boy Scouts Boy Scouts come back from camp."

"Response to ""LPT: If you ever get cold..."" What if your corner isn't 90 degrees? Well, it just wouldn't be right."

"[NSFW] What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Gagged"

"""Make cave drawing. It last longer."" - Cavewoman bitch"

"On a scale from one to ten, how obsessed with Harry Potter are you? About nine and three-quarters."

"There must be a special discount store for plumbers... There pants are always 50% off"

"I asked a pretty homeless woman... I asked a pretty homeless women if I could take her home, she said yes with a big smile. The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box."

"Rey: Why do you hide behind a mask? Kylo Ren: *takes off his mask to reveal his real face* Rey: Wow. Put the mask back on."

"""Welcome... To Jurassic Park."" ""But some of these dinosaurs are from the Cretaceous Period--"" ""WE ALREADY MADE THE SIGNS"""