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Joke of the Day

"How many Hispanics does it take to change a light bulb..? Just Juan."

"Coffee's a great way to fool yourself into believing you're going to have a productive day."

"Judge threw out a lawsuit against Starbucks said the Plaintiff had no grounds."

"I blew a speaker in my car today yea, he was motivational speaker, it left a bad taste in my mouth but I've been feeling a lot more positive ever since."

"My asian girlfriend made me mad so I replied in text message with.. -_-"

"Alien: we are here to enslave you Me: *not looking up from phone* huh? Alien: I SAID.. Me: *still not looking up* yeah I said I'll do it"

"I was in math class and my teacher asked ""What comes after 69?"" Apparently ""I do"" is not the correct answer."

"What do Dwarfs and Midgets have in common? very little"

"Why was the Dragonborn arrested in the Whiterun bakery? Dough fucking."

"What are sardines? A little fish that smells like fingers."