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Joke of the Day

"Genuinely stunned France has adopted the word ""wifi"" rather than ""le signal librement accessible sans l'utilisation de fils"" or some shit."

"What did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead and I'll give these two a lift."

"A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually."

"I'm walking on sunshine, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and I'm startin' to feel AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS TERRIBLE"

"Neighbor just yelled at me for playing in his sprinkler. Note to self, I should wear clothes next time."

"Today's youth are getting worse. I was in a church yesterday, when I saw a guy lighting a cigarette from the candle. I was so shocked, that I dropped my beer bottle."

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of intoxicants."

"What did one gay man say to another gay man at the bar? May I push in your stool"

"You know what they should call ""Tinder"" in Manhattan? The New York Cock Exchange"

"Why do people with OCD like Family Feud? Because it's always black and white."