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Joke of the Day
"My phone tried to auto-correct ""f*cking"" to ""f*ck king,"" and I was like hell yeah I am."
Next Joke
"My new years resolution for 2012 is to figure out how calendars work"
"Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong."
"What do you call a group of black people? a group, you racist."
"You can't be a real country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER."
"10 minutes into the work day and this subreddit is like the frozen section at the butcher shop. There are no fresh links."
"That moment when someone asks you 'How are you doing?' and you respond 'I'm doing ok. Getting better each day' & they stab you for answering"
"Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a registered six offender."
"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? You can't marmalade your dick up your girlfriend's arse."
"People who do anal... (NSFW-ish) People who do anal are fucking assholes."