45466

Joke of the Day

"Oh, jokes from 7 year-olds are cool now? From my son last night: ""Why do sea gulls fly over the sea?"" Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bay gulls (""like bagels, get it Dad?"")."

"If you don't use a bottle opener to open your beer, you drink shitty beer."

"A successful man is one who makes more money that his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."

"My wife hasn't said a word to me in 6 days. What's even better is, she thinks it's punishment."

"I always read r/creepy when i poop It scares the shit outa me..."

"How do trains from different countries understand each other? With a trainslator"

"The Chinese emperor went out on a guys night. It was the man-date of heaven."

"Want the secret to success? Want 2x the energy without having to diet? Want to add 20 years to your life? Want less shoulder hair? Me too."

"I think weed is messing with my memory. I can't remember shit anymore! I think it's because weed is messing with my memory."

"When Jesus Makes Tea... Hebrews"