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Joke of the Day

"Planned to go to Thailand for my vaca this year but after hearing about the ladyboys I thought Phuket"

"Why did the Baker have brown hands? Because he kneaded a poo."

"Sometimes I scratch my balls and then smell my fingers. It's not a big deal really"

"*takes out one earbud* ""not guilty, your honor"""

"Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell *im so sorry*"

"TIL: A second is called a second because it's not first."

"What is the definition of a farmer? Someone who is outstanding in his field."

"Cunt Jokes Q. What do you call a pink tractor? Ans: A cunt-tractor (contractor)"

"What does Bill Cosby do when he can't sleep at night? He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea."

"Start the day with a big bowl of why the fuck am I awake."