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Joke of the Day

"Honestly, guys, I think I've made the perfect woman this time. She's made totally out of waffles. And her clitoris is on her forehead."

"UPS driver jumps out within 2 sec"

"I once caught my ex-girlfriend putting acorns into her vagina... She was fucking nuts."

"Actually told a girl who's moving to France soon that ""there's lots of French people over there"". It's a wonder how I can even bathe myself."

"What do you call a horse that's a criminal? A Zebra."

"Just saw John Cena! lol jk"

"Did you know two melons of the same sex can't marry? Does that mean they cantaloupe? *Thanks to My Drunk Kitchen!"

"And the Lord said unto John.. ""Come forth and receive eternal life."" But John came fifth and won a toaster."

"My wife's starsign was Cancer, which is quite ironic really, thinking about how she died... she was attacked by a giant crab"

"Why do German showerheads have 11 holes? Jews only have 10 fingers."