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Joke of the Day

"Why is it called finding nemo? been wondering for years"

"That's the problem with exhibitionists. They're fucking everywhere."

"How can you tell if a girl is a lesbian? Look really closely at her tongue.... If it's in another girls vagina, she's a lesbian"

"Instead of playing FarmVille I just send blank email messages to myself and then delete them."

"What do you call a baby Muslim? A hand grenade."

"You seem like the type of person I might give my heart to, but as nervously as I'd be watching a drunk holding a newborn."

"Remember how terrified Sarah Connor was when the Terminator came around the corner @ the hospital in T2? IMAGINE IF IT HAD BEEN STEVE HARVEY"

"Only attractive people that get laid all the time troll people on the internet. Everybody knows that."

"What's round and hard and full of acidic semen? A Jewish submarine."

"Sure... when Miley Cyrus gets naked and licks a hammer it's ""sexy"" and ""art"" But when I do it I'm ""drunk"" and need to ""get out of Home Depot"""