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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the woman who gave birth in her 50's? You haven't? Oh, wait...that's right.... that's because they can't. (Menopause) Ha."

"Someone hash-tagged ""share the love,"" and I read it as ""shave the love."" I thought, yeah, I can get on board with that."

"Really sucks for those addicted to Apple products... ...now there is no *escape*"

"I'm making a party for people who can't ejaculate... Let me know if you are coming or not."

"When I'm pushing the twins in the pram and someone asks me if they're mine I say 'no, they're for my collection' and run as fast as I can"

"You can consider yourself lucky in life, if the cognac you drink is older than the woman that you're sleeping with."

"Islam is a religion of piece. There's a piece of you over there, a piece over there, another over there.."

"Just laid an egg. Very worried"

"What do you call an article written about a dead astronaut? An *orbit*-tuary!"

"knock knock whos there"