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Joke of the Day
"How do you make 5 pounds of ugly fat really attractive? Put a nipple on it!"
Next Joke
"I thought of a black joke. But it doesn't work."
"Another joke thread...What's your best: I'm as/so angry ________ (or variant) Here's mine: I'm more pissed off than a dragon trying to blow out birthday candles."
"TURTLE: hey, you carry your house around too! HERMIT CRAB: i do. where'd you find yours? T: i was born with it HC: *scoff* ok princess"
"How did Hellen Keller burn her ear? She answered the iron."
"Can you believe my fucking neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30 this morning?! 2:30am! Luckily for him I was still up playing my drums..."
"women's rights"
"KIDNAPPER: Get in the van ME: Oh no thanks I'm vegetarian KIDNAPPER: Oh okay sorry *drives away* {15min later} KIDNAPPER: Wait a minute, wtf"
"How many mottophobics does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Who do you think broke the filament in the first place?"
"How you compliment an Italian cheese maker? ""Gouda worka"""