43368

Joke of the Day

"A survey was held on what citizens of the United Kingdom thought of the new DOOM game... The overwhelming response was ""bloody hell"""

"Girlfriend Detective Girlfriend: ""I'm sick of you pretending you're a detective. I think we should split up."" Me: ""Good idea. We can cover more ground that way."""

"What do you call an Italian romance novel model who's let himself go? Flabio"

"Why did the hipster die? someone told him billions of people were alive."

"I trimmed all the bushes in the front yard to make my house look bigger."

"Why hasn't bigfoot ever gone to prison? Because he has only been convicted mythdemeanors."

"Moratorium on the word ""Awkward."" We're all awkward. We fart when we don't want to and that guy/gal over there is cooler. Get over it."

"My girlfriend yelled at me today saying, ""You weren't even listening just now, were you?!"" I thought, ""Man, what a weird way to start a conversation."""

"Don't read this if you don't like sensitive topics Biting into an ice cream"

"What do you call a chicken vegetable? Bawk Choy"