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Joke of the Day
"I was talking to a record producer at the urinals and now I've got a number 1 on my hands"
Next Joke
"It's ok to leave a client with split ends if you're a hairdresser. But not if you're a mohel!"
"hello poison control. i need some poison asap, my kid is being a real piece of shit. yes i'll hold."
"How can you tell your girlfriend is getting fat? She can fit into your wife's clothes"
"Girls who use tanning beds either have no concept of what they actually look like or have advanced fantasies about being a waffle."
"Me: Not to be racist but you look like you're sick Her: How was that racist? Me: I said ""not to be racist"" you must be sicker than I thought"
"Pro Tip: I'm not a pro. Don't listen to my tips."
"What is most popular hearthstone deck in Germany? Patron Warrior because Everyone Get in Here"
"Someone once told me I'm a sociopath. I'm not sure how I feel about it."
"The Puritans were a bunch of stuck-up pricks. They had such a holier-than-thou attitude."