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Joke of the Day

"Why did sally fall of the swing ? She didn't have any arms . Knock-Knock Who's there ? Not Sally !"

"They said to get in touch with my feminine side. So I did, and my next paycheck was 22% less."

"How do you know when a joke has gone too far? It's elected President."

"Still waiting for the day I can illegally download groceries"

"Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night."

"When life gives you lemons . . . demand to see life's manager."

"I had to make a difficult decision when arrested at the border on the way to Mecca... I was caught between Iraq and a Hajj place."

"I was watching the Cosmos, when Neil Degrasse Tyson related our genes are similar to ones in trees That means that all men have got wood in dem jeans."

"At this point I feel like MTV is just trying to scare old people."

"Why do they carry Marines around on Naval ships? Because sheep would be too obvious."