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Joke of the Day

"If Donald Trump becomes president, he'll increase taxes, he'll increase borders... And the population of Canada."

"I've been texting so much lately that I move my thumbs from side to side when I'm actually talking to someone."

"The waiter came up to my table and said, ""Can I take your order?"" I said, ""Sure."" He said, ""Thanks, I'm just really hungry."""

"What has four legs and one arm? A Rottweiler on a playground."

"Stay out of sight - Lei Lo"

"What do you get if you stick ur finger up a moderators ass? [DELETED]"

"What does a redneck say after sex? Thanks, sis."

"What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches."

"I don't understand why people are in awe when I tell them my grandfather survived Auschwitz. Most of the other German officers did too!"

"In what town lives the mathematician who can only multiply by two? Dublin."