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Joke of the Day

"With Murray testing free agency maybe the cowboys should pick up both Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson on the cheap! They would be a good one two punch!"

"I like my women how I like my candy bars... with nuts"

"You did yoga. You didn't negotiate a peace treaty. Stop walking around like that."

"A psychic goes to buy clothes Employee: how about this one? Psychic: That top is too small Employee: You didn't even try it on Psychic: I'm a medium"

"Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol."

"'Is this spicy?' 'Is this spicy?' 'Is this spicy?' 'Is this spicy?' 'Is this spicy?' 'Is this spicy?' - White people at Indian Buffets"

"What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? A pickpocket snatches watches... Courtesy of the late Redd Foxx."

"Why are blowjobs referred to as ""giving head""? ... because it's the only way for women to get ahead in life."

"How to explain to your parents that you are a prostitute Hey mom, remember when I said I was tight for money? Now I'm loose for money."

"There are 10 types of people in the world Those who know binary, those who don't, and those who weren't expecting this joke to be in ternary"