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Joke of the Day
"""They're looking for you."" ""Who is?"" ""These nuts"""
Next Joke
"""I was in a very generous mood today"" a woman says to her friend. ""I gave a poor beggar $25."" ""Thats a lot of money to give away"" says her friend. ""What did your husband say?"" ""He said 'Thank you'. """
"Wife: ""I look fat. Can you give me........ Wife: ""I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"" Husband: ""You have perfect eyesight."""
"Whats the Difference between Acne and A priest? Whats the Difference between acne and a priest? Acne wont come on your face unil youre 13."
"Start a slow-clap in a quiet, crowded room. The first person that joins you, marry them. They're your soulmate."
"Vegans have a special acronym for 'Today I Fucked Up' TOFU"
"Nick clegg themed toilets They're full of shit"
"She said ""you look like trouble""...so I nudged her down the stairs, because I don't like people falling short of their expectations."
"Are you a can of biscuits? Because I'd like to bang you on the counter."
"When people write, ""your dumb,"" maybe it's not a typo--they just mean stupidity belongs to you. ""Here's your dumb now leave."""