41903

Joke of the Day

"I drink to forget that I accidentally once said ""I love you"" when ending a call with a customer service rep."

"What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass? Beer"

"Two silkworms are in a race. What is the result? A tie."

"As a child, I wanted to be a psychologist. But my parents told me, ""We're a-Freud you're too Jung for that."""

"I was at the public swimming pool today and decided to have a sneaky piss in the deep end. The lifeguard must have noticed - he blew his whistle so fucking loud, I nearly fell in."

"In a furious argument, the wife tells her husband... - I should have married the devil instead of you! - Well, that's impossible. Marriage between cousins is forbidden!"

"What do you call a frisbee that's more than a friend? Frisbae"

"You know, I really didn't need to scratch my balls today at all. Not once - said no man EVER"

"I now know I drink too much. I walked out on my deck and swear I heard a mosquito yell out to his all his friends that the bar just opened."

"Two nuns are riding bicycles in Paris... One says, ""I've never come this way before."" The other replies, ""must be the cobblestones."""