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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes when I throw up I like to pretend the toilet is a baby bird and you're not even reading this anymore are you."

"[OC] Did you hear about this new restaurant they're opening called The Glory Hole? ...Yeah, it's a real hole in the wall."

"What popular board game do dyslexics hate? Scramble"

"A Higgs Boson particle walks into a church... ""You can't be here"" says the pastor The Higgs Boson particle responds ""But with out me, how can you have mass?!"""

"What do you call it when someone eats too much wheat? Glutteny."

"If an Elvis impersonator dies, doesn't he kind of become the best Elvis impersonator"

"How do you get a nun pregnant? You fuck her"

"I was talking to Marcel Marceau the other day. You know what he said? Nothing he's dead"

"None of the women liked Richard William Soft He's Dick Willy Soft"

"John is swinging Lisa around with a period of 0.5 revolutions per second. What happens when the period is increased? John Unexpectedly paints his walls red."