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Joke of the Day

"Short story about sharpness. Man 1: What is more sharp Mouth or Anus? Man 2: Mouth. Man 1: Can you cut your shit using your Mouth? Man 2: ..."

"What do vegetarian zombies eat? Graaaaaaiiiins......"

"The pollen is so bad this year ...that it has the addicts turning their meth back into sudafed!"

"Gas should cost /gallon. Since the price is irrational."

"What does a neckbeard eat when he is in a Mcdonalds in France? Le Big Mac"

"Today is my twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Really? Yes I've been married twenty-five times!"

"""I stand corrected"" said the man in the orthopedic shoes."

"Why does Santa Claus only have seven reindeer? Because Prancer moved in with a hairdresser in Beverly Hills."

"My wife said ""If you switch off the light, I will take it up the ass."" She let out a scream. Maybe I should have waited for the bulb to cool off first..."

"Why are books about the social contract and demand-side economics so hard to find? Because they're kept firmly under Locke and Keynes."