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Joke of the Day

"Foreign Aid: The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries."

"How do you fix a broken Tuba? Tuba glue."

"Archimedes Principle floats my boat."

"Accidentally called 911. Set my house on fire to not look stupid."

"Why wouldn't they let Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman"

"""I heard you were responsible for like 30 million deaths. That's crazy."" Jimmy Fallon interviewing Stalin"

"I tried to get team shirts for a sailing camp I'm going on But I just couldn't get the idea to stay afloat"

"Hey, ladies, if you look like a snake swallowed a rib cage you're too skinny."

"Judge: You stand before me accused of being a duvet. How do you plead? Defendant: Not quilty."

"What did the Marvel character say when he attained full control of his Android's CPU and Kernel? I am Root."