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Joke of the Day

"What's worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxi cabs! Got this from a joke book my niece got for Christmas. Most of them were groaners but this one actually made me laugh!"

"What the difference between a filthy bus station and a crab with implants? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean ......"

"How do you turn a seal into a sea lion? Remove an electron."

"You know how birds fly in a V and sometimes one side is longer than the other? You know why that is? It's because there are more birds on that side."

"A schmooze.... ...what Sean Connery calls an afternoon nap"

"I started running back and forth repeatedly... ...and now my head hertz."

"A slice of pizza walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says ""I'm sorry, we don't serve food."""

"Good for you when one door closes & another door opens. For the rest of us that usually means we're in jail."

"*Spoiler* US Presidential Election Result Leaked The dodgy, incompetent, unfit, slightly psychotic, rich, possibly criminal one who should 't even be in the race, wins."

"What crawls up walls and scares the shit outta Jews? Gas pipes."