40123
Joke of the Day
"Ever hear about the lost Vikings? Ask the Seahawks."
Next Joke
"My phone just fell down a flight of stairs, but it's ok, it was in my pocket."
"Wife wants to relax today! Wife: Today, I want to relax, so I have brought three movie tickets. Husband: why three tickets? Wife: you and your parents."
"I accidentally muted the command switch on my driverless car... ...well, it goes without saying."
"Cow: Why don't you shoo those flies? Bull: I'll let them go barefoot!"
"My wife and I were shopping the other day, she said she needed a new pillow. I said ""That's a big decision, you should sleep on it."""
"Benedict Cumberbatch is proof that a white guy banged a cat."
"What do Aaron Hernandez and Jared Fogle now have in common? Matching uniforms."
"""Bones?"" I said. ""Is that you?"" ""In the flesh"", it replied."
"My 40 yard dash time: 5.5 My 40 yard dash time after seeing my gf with my phone in her hands: 4.3"