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Joke of the Day

"Whats long and hard and has cum in it ................... A cucumber :)"

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"According to the bloodwork I had done at my doctor's office, I'm 12 percent cake."
"Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? Because he's married."
"*googles murder tips *adds ""asking for a friend"" at the end of each search They won't be able to prove a thing! *evil cackles"
"What is the similarity between Election and Erection? The words election and erection are spelled similarly. They both have the same meaning too: a dick rising to power."
"Yes, Pitbull, we are having a good time. Please stop asking every two minutes."
"What is the prettiest thing about a DC girl? Her resume."
"My ""I'm enraged!"" status update on Facebook garnered a lot of congratulations from people who don't read well."
"I just took laxatives and huffed some nitrous oxide... for shits and giggles."
"If I got karma for posts... I'd still have no karma"