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Joke of the Day

"I lost my watch at a party once Saw a guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a girl. I walked up to the dude, punched him straight in the nose. No one does that to a girl, not on my watch."

Next Joke
 
"What do you call immigrants to Sweden? Artificial Swedeners"
"Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life...... unless it gets in his way."
"First Guy (proudly): My wife's an angel!' Second Guy: You're lucky, mine's still alive."
"Why did the little pig hide the soap? He heard the farmer yell ""Hogwash!"""
"Library Asked librarian for book on suicide. Said no one returns them."
"What does Batman do for Father's Day? Nothing"
"This morning I woke up, got out, and went for a five mile run That's the last time I try to push start a car by myself."
"I sometimes watch birds and wonder ""If I could fly who would I shit on?"""
"3 days ago I got a pass-code lock that takes a picture whenever someone enters the wrong code in my phone. So far I have 26 pictures of drunk me."