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Joke of the Day

"Why hasn't any lawyer ever been bitten by a shark? Professional courtesy."

"You know what's more annoying than cops? People who buy old refurbished cop cars and keep the spotlight attached. We all hate you."

"Q: How did a blind man get poke marks on his face? A: Learning to eat with a fork."

"What do you call a monster with a wooden head? Edward."

"I heard Apple is designing a new automatic car. But they're having trouble installing windows."

"I could tell my parents truly loved me as a child. My bath toys were a toaster, radio and a blow dyer."

"I was gonna play Zelda via online emulator, but didn't wanna close the site I was on... ...so I clicked ""open Link in New Tab""."

"My friends keep telling me to stop making jokes about Linkin Park But I just ignore them because in the end, it doesn't even matter"

"What did the green grape say to the purple grape? ""Breathe you idiot! Breathe!"""

"I just bought a sewing machine I needed to get my sheet together"