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Joke of the Day
"What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken!"
Next Joke
"The best way to get over someone is probably with your car"
"I'll stop calling you a racist if you stop bragging about all the marathons you run."
"Why did the dog run into the corner every time the door bell rang? because he is a Boxer"
"So the Chicken and the Egg are laying in bed. The Chicken lights up a cigarette, takes a deep drag and says, ""Well, I guess that answers that question..."""
"Unexplainable things: 1) Stonehenge 2) ESP 3) How my car insurance company can magically lower my renewal cost when I threaten to leave them"
"Did you hear about the guy who was half black and half Japanese? On every Dec. 7, he would attack Pearl Bailey."
"Every so often I'll listen to my wife talk non stop for hours at a time to remind myself why people wander into traffic without looking."
"My favorite pick-up line: Hey girl, my name is Tony. You know what that is backwards? Y not."
"I was simply stating that your crying child MIGHT fit comfortably in the overhead compartment, lady. #butseriously"