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Joke of the Day

"The first thing they teach you in AA is to stop hanging around other alcoholics. So I listened, and never went back."

"Who plays center forward for the vampire football team? The ghoulscorer."

"Only true feminists will get this Offended"

"Cowboy and a Drugstore Clerk Cowboy: Give me three packs of condoms please. Clerk: You need a bag with that? Cowboy: Nah... She's purty good lookin..."

"A nigger a spic and an arab walk into a bar. The arab blows them all up."

"What do you call 30 gay guys buttfucking in a circle? A creme-filled donut."

"After being made bishop, a man is asked what his next move will be. Diagonal."

"""GET A TREE"" - what I just yelled at two squirrels doing it on my lawn"

"Two muffins are in an oven. The first says ""It sure is hot in here""... and the baker says, ""HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN"""

"What did one succulent say to the other? ""Aloe there"""