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Joke of the Day

"Lawyer: ""What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"" Defendent: ""Gucci Sweats and Sum Jordan's"""

"How many Freudian psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to change the light bulb, and the other to hold the peni-- I MEAN LADDER"

"How did God get Mary pregnant? He used the holy immaculate contraception"

"Save the whales Collect the whole set. seen on a bumper sticker in PDX"

"I just moved to Wisconsin, and my neighbour invited me over to meet his wife and his sister. When I got there... ...the three of us had dinner."

"You only live once. Make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet daily, desperately seeking validation from strangers."

"ME AS A MARRIAGE COUNSELOR: I signed you both up for Tinder *1 week later ME: You still want a divorce? THEM: OMG NO THAT WAS HORRIFYING"

"What do a bucket and a woman have in common? Before 1928, neither could vote."

"Why did the blonde woman have bruises around her belly button? Because blonde guys arent that smart either..."

"Son: Dad, you work so hard and never get any credit. You're like a superhero! Dad: Nice try. You're still not getting the Internet password."