39066

Joke of the Day

"It only takes 3 inches to please a woman. And it doesn't matter if it's mastercard, visa or American express."

"watch only the first and last episodes of How I Met Your Mother. you're welcome"

"Why did the interrupting cow cross the road? MOOOOOO!!!!"

"wow american really nailed the demographic of the 6am business traveler with the in flight movie selection of madagascar 3"

"What do you call a lesbian chicken? A sticky beak!"

"One time I fell off a 20ft ladder, then climbed right back up and jumped off a second time to show that ladder who's in charge."

"What does a dentist do in his free time? Shoot lions."

"I thought getting a vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant.... But all it did was change the color of the baby."

"No thanks, fantasy football. I already have a fantasy boyfriend, a fantasy sex life & a fantasy bank account. I'm good."

"Q: How does a wizard keep his potions safe from burglary? A: With a warlock."