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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between Jelly and Jam? I cant jelly my dick in your mouth"

"What was the last phone call made from the Twin Towers? An order for two large plains."

"Don't ask a pregnant lady ""do you know the sex?"" obviously she knows about sex she's pregnant you stupid idiot"

"My daughter wrote, ""I will see you every day of our lives,"" on my Mother's Day card, so I guess we've resorted to threats now."

"Renewing public sector is like moving a graveyard. You won't get much help from those already there."

"3 K's don't a right They make a white"

"[3 days into dieting] *sees ad for burger & fries* *drowns in his own saliva*"

"Your mom is so fat... The last time she had sex, they called it the Big Bang!"

"How does Microsoft count to 10? 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."

"My friend likes to make carvings of people of religion in his spare time. You'd like a punchline to this, wooden jew."