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Joke of the Day
"[arguing with my wife] WELL AT LEAST I DON'T BRING UP THINGS FROM THE PAST LIKE YOU DID LAST MONTH"
Next Joke
"Susie has no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Susie"
"Work today had a sexual harassment seminar It was a real let down when I found out they weren't going to teach how to sexually harass."
"How many Dornishmen does it take to shoe a horse? Nine. One to do the shoeing, and eight to lift up the horse!"
"Behind Every Successful man. Teacher: Behind every successful man there is a women what do we learn from this? Student: we should stop wasting time in studies and find a woman."
"So /r/news and /r/The_Donald walk into a bar... [removed]"
"911 Worker > 911,What's your emergency? Man > My wife is going to give birth! Worker > Is this her first born? Man > No,it's her husband *Ba Dum Tss*"
"Sorry I put a Gryffindor scarf on the baby Jesus in your nativity scene and called him Hermione Manger."
"I could tell you that sodium hydroxide is a liquid out of solution. But then that would be a lye."
"What do you fire from underwater guns? Seashells"