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Joke of the Day
"Susie has no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Susie"
Next Joke
"There is no way alcohol kills more people than it creates"
"What's black on top and white on the bottom? rape"
"I once stood 2 Twix bars up. Allahu Snackbar! (It was originally ""Allahu Akbar"", but u/Disagreeing_Man made it funnier.)"
"My favourite girls are like carpenters. They never let wood go to waste."
"WELL WELL WELL, if it isn't the lady who's baby I stole."
"This bar smells so bad and I can't tell who's homeless and who's a hipster."
"I hate it when restraining orders get in the way of meaningful relationships. Well played future wife. You win this round"
"If you are what you eat... I can see why some men are assholes and some women are dicks."
"Jared Fogle of Subway told his wife she didn't have to worry about the Ashley Madison leaks... ...he was on Club Penguin."