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Joke of the Day

"To test my ability to emphasthize I tried to force myself to empathize with Brock Turner But if I learned anything from him it's that some things should never be forced"

"Did you hear about a guy who collected memorabilia of Rosa Parks, Florence Nightingale, Joan of Arc, and Wonder Woman? Apparently, he was a heroine addict."

"What did the Egyptian boy say to the Egyptian girl? ""Come behind the pyramid, I'll make you a mummy"""

"So my spreadsheet program hasn't been working for 40 days... ...it was excellent."

"How do you know you're speaking with an engineer? Don't worry they'll tell you."

"Why couldn't the baby Jesus be born in Utah? Because they couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin."

"What kind of drink does a ghetto drinks? A GHETTOrade"

"Her: Ok you hang up. Him: No, you hang up first. Her: No, you first. Him: No, you first. NSA: Both of you hang up."

"The local cemetery has been really popular lately People are dying to get in."

"Did you hear about the Chinese man who was arrested for sodomizing a 9-year-old? His name was Yung Bu Ti."