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Joke of the Day
"How do you know your sister is on her period? When your dads dick tastes like shit."
Next Joke
"How many tickles... How many tickles before a squid starts to laugh? Ten tickles"
"What's my type? Someone who is supportive. Someone who is warm. Someone I can just curl up and relax with. Wait I'm describing my bed again."
"I went to a feminist picnic recently It was terrible. No one cooked or made any sandwiches."
"Today i started stalking guys. Not for any gay reason but it's so much easier to do. Women always complain, guys don't suspect a thing."
"When ever a girl wears a shirt saying 'I Woke Up Like This' I resist the urge to say I'm sorry about that."
"Boss asked if I was ready for more responsibility. I'm eating around a sticker on an apple cause I'm too lazy to peel it off so I guess no."
"Took and Ambien and a Viagra at the same time again. Im finding it hard to sleep."
"What do you call a wolf with Stockholm Syndrome? A Dog."
"Early bird gets the worm 2nd mouse gets the cheese 3rd cow gets the grass All cows get to eat grass tho, theres not really a low supply."