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Joke of the Day

"History exam. There was no match for the history exam that Mr. Grey had set for his students. It was the Grey test of all time."

"I came up with a really awful joke, but I'm sure some of you are twisted like me. I've got a knife and a penis. Which one do you want first?"

"I'm sorry I threw up all over your carpet when you referred to your spouse as your ""lover""."

"Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining. I mean, c'mon. Let's spice it up a little. Aim for my chest and call me your ""naughty potty""."

"I really only know one thing about Ebola. For some reason, it makes you really wanna go to the airport."

"Helen Keller was blind and deaf. She would still lip sync better than Mariah Carey."

"i don't want to masturbate... ...but im doing this ""1000 days in a row"" thing"

"""Don't worry, I'll hold your stuff. You just worry about making friends."" - Cargo Pants"

"FUN PRANK: Bump into Kanye in public, pretend you don't recognize him, and say ""EXCUSE ME ORDINARY CITIZEN"" Then watch how mad he gets."

"Is there a button you can push to take back when you're accidentally nice to someone, so they know you still hate them?"