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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between your mom and wine? With age, wine doesn't suck anymore."

"Someone accused my dad of stealing from his job in the roads department... ...I thought it was nothing to worry about but when I got home the signs were everywhere."

"I'm not saying my wife is fat... but I struggle to lift her photograph"

"I was trying to think up some squirrel puns. But, they were all too nutty."

"Men want to be him. Women want to be with him. Bears want to eat him. Botflies want to lay their eggs in his skin. Fish are unaware of him."

"What is the definition of a goose ? An animal that grows down as it grows up !"

"What did the dog say to the pig? ""You are such a bore."""

"I have more memory of my conception than I do of last Saturday night... though sometimes I really wish my parents hadn't done porn."

"What do you call it when the girl you like likes you back? Imagination"

"What do you call an Egyptian spine manipulator? A Cairo-practor"