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Joke of the Day
"Problems I've got 99 problems and they're all first world."
Next Joke
"My buddy used to say ""why should I wash my towels? After I shower, I'm the cleanest thing in the room."" He's still single."
"Will glass coffins be a success Clearly"
"Sea levels aren't rising due to global warming. They are rising due to the increase in obesity. The continents are actually sinking..."
"Why can't Elvis Presley drive? 'Cause he's dead."
"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The Bartender says, ""Hey, Rene, you want a scotch?"" Descartes replies, ""No, I think not."" And then he vanishes. No dice."
"What's a porn stars favorite golf course? The inter course"
"People call me ""big"", ""dumb"", and ""stupid"", which confuses me because I'm actually not very big"
"What did the sarcastic taximan say when he lost his job? Oh well that's just uber, isn't it"
"Why did the blonde have an Abortion? She wasn't convinced the baby was hers."