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Joke of the Day

"My new years resolution is to stop biting my toenails. Nervous habit I picked up during all these meetings at work."

Next Joke
 
"How do deaf mathematicians communicate? Sine language!"
"Her: You're a pathological liar! Me: ...and the King of Spain."
"Did you hear the one about three Scotsmen who walk out of a bar? It could happen.."
"Why was Ke$ha arrested? TiK ToK On The Clock"
"""Hmm, how can I look at her boobs but not look at her boobs?"" - Guy who invented sunglasses."
"What kind of meat does a priest eat? Nun. (this one is probably a little better spoken)"
"How do birds kiss? They give a peck to the cheek."
"Caught a taxi home last night from the market. Forgot I had no money. Thankfully the driver let me pay in cabbage"
"I like my pizza ""Chicago"" style. full of bullet holes."