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Joke of the Day
"Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? Mace"
Next Joke
"They say honesty is the best policy, but quite frankly, I think a million-dollar life insurance policy on a super old dude sounds better."
"Did you hear about the psychic midget that escaped from jail last night? Yeah, there's a small medium at large!"
"What kind of emotional tailspin causes people to ""like"" Lysol on Facebook?"
"What do you call deer with no eyes? No idea. What do you call deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea."
"AMA: I am a submarine naval commander discharged for friendly fire in an underwater sea battle Oops, wrong sub."
"Well it took forever but I just paid the pizza guy entirely with the quarters I found behind his ears."
"In an interview: ""How good are you with Microsoft PowerPoint?"" ""I Excel at it."" ""Did you just make a Microsoft Office pun, sir?"" ""Word."" Edit: thanks u/Steve_Jobs_iGhost"
"definitions of twerk 1. to dance and gyrate in a sexually explicit manner 2. what a native of Brooklyn New York says where he goes in the morning"
"Last night I was questioned by a detective, and then afterwards we had sex EDIT: Seriously, gilded? I'm speechless"