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Joke of the Day
"I am out of wine, so I ate a bag of grapes and threw myself down the stairs."
Next Joke
"WIFE: What did you just do? CAT: *bolts for no apparent reason* ME: *bolts in the opposite direction in case she's after both of us*"
"Copyright In India, copyright means the right to copy."
"It's not Wingardium Leviosa It's Wingardium Leviosah-Dude"
"*Giant boulder slowly crushes several hundred cats* Guy who's about to invent the bagpipes: Hey, this gives me an idea!"
"Two guys are walking when they come across a dog on the sidewalk, licking his balls. One guys says, ""I wish I could do that."" The other guy says, ""You better pet him first to make sure he's friendly."""
"If six children and two dogs were under an umbrella how come none of them got wet? Because it wasn't raining."
"What do you call a cross between Communism and Theocracy? Communionism"
"What did the young witch say to her mother? Can I have the keys to the broom tonight?"
"*drives up to liquor store door, honks horn *wine jumps off shelf, hops into my car *speeds off"