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Joke of the Day

"What is the scariest thing about a white man in prison? You know he did it."

"Teacher : How can we keep our school Clean? Student : By Staying at home. :p"

"Fred: I was going to buy you a handkerchief for your birthday. Betty: That was a kind thought. But why didn't you? Fred: I couldn't find one big enough for your nose."

"8: I'm scared of monsters under my bed Me: You should really be scared of spiders that will lay eggs in your ear 8: MOM! Wife: ZACK!"

"What do you call a sunburnt santa? Crisp Cringle"

"Bf and I are on 2 completely different emotional planes right now. Work faster, whiskey."

"3 guys walked into a bar to watch football... none of them knew what was going on."

"Did I ever tell you about the time I had a fart that lasted for an entire minute? It's a long-winded story."

"I hide photos on my computer of me petting animals at the zoo in a file named Fireworks and vacuums so my dog won't find them."

"FRIEND: Just let her down easy ME: Ok [later] ME: *jumping in bouncy castle* I WANT A DIVORCE, KAREN"